Four Months

So I guess I am a terrible mom since I have not written anything about Baby Girl in so long! It must of been because back in those days she was sleeping a lot and I had lots of time. Well now that I am back to work I have NO time. I am behind on everything. Like I told my sister in law today.... We are just keeping our head down trying to survive. I read a good analogy the other day about the first three months after having a baby... "The first 90 days feel like climbing a mountain. You have to stay focused, keep your head down, and push through it. before you know it, you will reach the top, and the skies will clear, and all will be bright." So true, and I wish I would have read it four months ago.... When I gave up so easily on breastfeeding because I was tired and stressed mixed with a little post-partum depression and didn't know what I was doing. One of my biggest regrets. I tried pumping and she threw it all up. I gave up too easily. But on the other hand, Maya is healthy and growing!! She's a happy baby, except when she is tired. I can't believe how fast four months has gone. I remember when she was a newborn and I would be up with her in the middle of the night and it was so hard... I remember saying to myself that I needed to enjoy and remember these times because she will never be this small again, and there were moments I just wanted to bottle up time so I could look back on that moment later. I would smell her sweet skin and kiss her head. Now I already feel those memories slipping away.... Time is so bittersweet. I miss rocking her to sleep, holding her for 30 minutes after eating (reflux) and I would fall asleep holding her. But I know we have many more memories and adventures to look forward to!